Address Change

I've been feeling a little ornery these days. Please accept my apologies, if I have hurt your feelings. This poem is one I learned when my children were younger. I am relearning it today.


I knew a woman whose name was Horner
Who used to live on Grumble Corner;
Grumble Corner in Crosspatch town
And she never was seen without a frown.

She grumbled at this, and she grumbled at that,
She growled at the dog. She growled at the cat.
She grumbled at morning. She grumbled at night.
And to grumble and growl was her chief delight.

She grumbled so much at her husband that he
Began to grumble as well as she.
And all the children, wherever they went,
Reflected their parents' discontent.

If the sky was dark and betokened with rain,
Then Mrs. Horner was sure to complain.
And if there was not a cloud about,
She grumbled because of a threatened drought.

Her meals were never to suit her taste--
She grumbled at having to eat in haste.
The bread was poor, or the meat was tough--
Or else she hadn't had half enough.

No matter how hard her husband would try
To please his wife, with scornful eye
She'd look around and then with a scowl
At something or other she'd begin to growl.

One day as I walked down the street,
My old acquaintance I chanced to meet;
Whose face was without the look of care
And the ugly frown that had drifted there.

"I may be mistaken" perhaps I said
As after saluting I turned my head!
"But it is, and it isn't the Mrs. Horner
Who used to live on Grumble Corner."

I met her next day and I met her again;
In melting weather and in pelting rain.
When stocks were up, and when stocks were down,
But a smile, somehow, had replaced the frown.

It puzzled me much, and so one day,
I seized her hand in a friendly way and said,
"Mrs. Horner, I'd like to know
What can have happened to change you so?"

She laughed a laugh that was good to hear;
For it told of a conscience, calm and clear.
And she said with none of her old-time drawl,
"Why I've changed my residence, that is all.

"Yes," said Horner, "It wasn't healthy on Grumble Corner"
And so, I've moved; t'was a change complete,
"And you will find me now
On Thanksgiving Street."